So I have concluded that the monkey must have been poisoned by someone very close to him in a former life. Every time I feed him we go through this "fun" routine before he finally starts to eat.
1. The introduction phase. This is how we get started. I put a bowl of food in front of him. The same food he has eaten everyday for the last few months. He looks at the food and looks at me and as the spoon gets close to his face he turns his head and smacks the spoon full of food all over the place. He then looks at me with an expression that says "What the hell do you think you're doing trying to shove that crap into my mouth"
2. This is the getting food into his mouth face. This is when I feel like on one of those miniature golf windmill holes where his mouth is the hole and his swinging arm the windmill. If I time it just right I can shove the spoon into his mouth and then I wait.
3. "The face" This is when he does the Oh my God what have you just put into my mouth? This is the most terrible thing I have ever had in my mouth. This could be anything from a lovely piece of muffin to a spoon of yogurt. He still looks absolutely disgusted and pretends to choke and vomit up the food.
4. Acceptance. After this fun ritual he swallows the first spoon and then spends the next ten minutes with his mouth wide open allowing you to put the rest of the food in his gullet. Of course this is done while singing various songs from the classic old McDonald to some weird sounding Russian children songs. If he doesn't like the song you are singing then you go back to step one!
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